Holding Patterns

There is nothing worse for a writer than a blank piece of paper.  All that whiteness can be daunting.  Like the sand along the seashore or the sky kissing the ocean, it goes on and on into nothingness.  Like the sheer drop off a mountain cliff with nothing but swirling clouds below.  Like the vast open arctic tundra’s eternity of snow…  I think you get the picture.

Last week, I talked about my dreams having to shift and change.  That I didn't know which way to go but I know Someone who does.  This is where the rubber meets the road because sometimes we have clear direction and sometimes we are in a holding pattern.  From my vast experience, I can tell you that holding patterns are often aggravating, discouraging, and anxiety ladened.  And it can be very annoying to see the same scenery over and over again.  But that’s only if I let it be.  If I choose to rest in God, a holding pattern can be a time of refreshing, slowing down, gathering my strength, learning to appreciate the stillness and hearing His still small voice.

And just like the writer who knows where the story begins, ends and all the pitfalls between, God has my complete life laid out before Him.  Because of where I stand, all I see is sand; He sees the driftwood, seashells and seaweed washed up on shore.  I see sky and ocean; He sees the shark stalking its prey or the dolphin breaching the surface in play.  I see swirling clouds; He sees the soaring eagle and the bounding mountain lion.  I see an eternity of snow; He sees the arctic rabbit and fox.

I am well aware that a lot of my holding patterns were my own fault.  I was there because God was moving over me (where I could not see) to make the crooked path I had created straight so I could, once again, move toward my goal.  Then there are holding patterns like this one.  I did not create it but I’m here. 

After Jesus was crucified, Peter said “I go a fishing’.  We often vilify him for returning to the life he knew before he met Jesus.  But, we need to remember that Jesus had not yet told them to wait in Jerusalem for the baptism of the Holy Spirit.  Nor had He told them to go into all the world and preach the gospel.  Peter knew one thing—Jesus had found him fishing the first time; He would do it again.  Jesus did and the Bible never says He scolded Peter for returning to his boat.

So, like Peter, I will stay here and do what I know to do.  God knows where I am and when the time is right, He will show me the way to go.