Mind Set

Definition:

• A particular way of thinking.
• A person’s attitude or set of opinions about something (or themselves).
• A mental inclination, tendency or habit.

Lately, I have been writing about taking hold of what the Bible says about me instead of what I say about myself.  I have been adjusting my way of thinking but I hadn’t noticed any real changes until this weekend.

Old mind set: 

• I don’t know enough.
• I don’t have the right equipment/tools.
• I don’t have enough money.

Notice the common denominator I?  (Or I could have used the ‘I can’ts’.)  I am pretty sure I know 95% of the ‘I don’ts’ and because of past circumstances, I formed the habit of using them as an excuse about everything (even some things I knew I could do).  I have two friends who have really been nagging me about it.  Evidently, it’s finally started sinking in.

Saturday, I attended the Christian Writer’s Conference at East Texas Baptist University.  I worked in the book shop (thank you very much, Vickie) and sat in on two of the workshops.  As the speakers were talking about the ways they market their books, articles and themselves I thought, I can do that. 

Whoa!!  Talk about radical change.  Of course, this blog was a major step in the right direction.  Still…  Writing a blog from the obscurity of my home is not the same as getting out there and tooting my own horn.  I know I need to do it but…I’m definitely old school when it comes to that. Yet, I self-published my books because even if I had gotten published by a ‘big house’, I would have had to do all my own marketing, anyway.  

So the change?

New mind set (a work in progress):

• What I don’t know, I can learn.
• I have enough to start and can obtain the rest as I go.
• God is my source; He will provide.

I know; ‘bout time.

Holding Patterns

There is nothing worse for a writer than a blank piece of paper.  All that whiteness can be daunting.  Like the sand along the seashore or the sky kissing the ocean, it goes on and on into nothingness.  Like the sheer drop off a mountain cliff with nothing but swirling clouds below.  Like the vast open arctic tundra’s eternity of snow…  I think you get the picture.

Last week, I talked about my dreams having to shift and change.  That I didn't know which way to go but I know Someone who does.  This is where the rubber meets the road because sometimes we have clear direction and sometimes we are in a holding pattern.  From my vast experience, I can tell you that holding patterns are often aggravating, discouraging, and anxiety ladened.  And it can be very annoying to see the same scenery over and over again.  But that’s only if I let it be.  If I choose to rest in God, a holding pattern can be a time of refreshing, slowing down, gathering my strength, learning to appreciate the stillness and hearing His still small voice.

And just like the writer who knows where the story begins, ends and all the pitfalls between, God has my complete life laid out before Him.  Because of where I stand, all I see is sand; He sees the driftwood, seashells and seaweed washed up on shore.  I see sky and ocean; He sees the shark stalking its prey or the dolphin breaching the surface in play.  I see swirling clouds; He sees the soaring eagle and the bounding mountain lion.  I see an eternity of snow; He sees the arctic rabbit and fox.

I am well aware that a lot of my holding patterns were my own fault.  I was there because God was moving over me (where I could not see) to make the crooked path I had created straight so I could, once again, move toward my goal.  Then there are holding patterns like this one.  I did not create it but I’m here. 

After Jesus was crucified, Peter said “I go a fishing’.  We often vilify him for returning to the life he knew before he met Jesus.  But, we need to remember that Jesus had not yet told them to wait in Jerusalem for the baptism of the Holy Spirit.  Nor had He told them to go into all the world and preach the gospel.  Peter knew one thing—Jesus had found him fishing the first time; He would do it again.  Jesus did and the Bible never says He scolded Peter for returning to his boat.

So, like Peter, I will stay here and do what I know to do.  God knows where I am and when the time is right, He will show me the way to go.

Square One

In the blog HOPE, I spoke about waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop.  Today’s question, what do you do when it does?

In the past, I would have

1. had a major pity party in the privacy of my home
2. had all joy knocked out of me
3. allowed all hope to fade
4. packed my dreams away in the steel vault of my heart
5. and thought ‘here I am back to square one.’ 

I’m definitely working on #1.  But, 2-4?  No! Not anymore.  My joy is not based on my circumstances; it’s based on my choice.  Same with hope.  My dreams will have to shift, maybe take a different direction but it took me a long time to drag these dreams kicking and screaming out of that deep, dark vault.  I refuse to put them back.

I find it a bit ironic that Sunday morning I asked the ladies’ prayer group to lay hands on me and pray for wisdom, especially where my words are concerned.  It was pow-er-ful.  Then Sunday afternoon, the shoe dropped.   

Psalms 37:4 says, ‘Delight thyself also in the Lord: and He shall give you the desires of your heart’.  I know the desires of my heart (dreams) are from the God.  I have settled that.  I’m not sure where to go from here but I know Someone who does.

So, square one.  I have realized there is no such thing as starting over or being back at square one.  It might look the same, it might feel the same, it might even smell the same but it isn’t.  Why?  Me.  I am never the same.  Especially this time.  I have learned so much and come so far over the last seven years; square one cannot be the same.

Those who know me know how much I hate sudden changes.  Was I prepared for this one? not even faintly.  Will I get past it? definitely. 

Now I see square one for what it really is; a stepping stone in a new direction.  

In Christ Alone

Sunday, a Facebook friend posted a video of David Wesley singing “In Christ Alone” acapella.  He sings every part.  It is awesome.  So at 2:30 Tuesday morning when leg pain set me to walking the floor, I pulled the video up and listened again (at least 10 times).  I had forgotten just how powerful the words are.  It is one of the most comprehensive songs about the Christian life from salvation to death.  I wish you could have been there with me as the presence of God filled my house.  The song speaks for itself so I leave you with the words and a link to the video.

In Christ alone my hope is found,
He is my light, my strength, my song;
this Cornerstone, this solid Ground,
firm through the fiercest drought and storm.
What heights of love, what depths of peace,
when fears are stilled, when strivings cease!
My Comforter, my All in All,
here in the love of Christ I stand.

In Christ alone! who took on flesh
Fullness of God in helpless babe!
This gift of love and righteousness
Scorned by the ones he came to save:
Till on that cross as Jesus died,
The wrath of God was satisfied
For every sin on Him was laid;
Here in the death of Christ I live.

There in the ground His body lay
Light of the world by darkness slain:
Then bursting forth in glorious Day
Up from the grave he rose again!
And as He stands in victory
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me,
For I am His and He is mine
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

No guilt in life, no fear in death,
This is the power of Christ in me;
From life's first cry to final breath.
Jesus commands my destiny.
No power of hell, no scheme of man,
Could ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home,
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand.

Words & Music by Keith Getty & Stuart Townend

David Wesley "In Christ Alone"